IFS Therapy
Parts Work Therapists in-person in Pasadena and virtually in California
At Her Space Los Angeles, we use an IFS-informed approach in therapy to help clients make sense of those moments with more compassion and less shame. We integrate parts work, EMDR, and somatic approaches depending on the client’s needs, especially when someone feels stuck in patterns that insight alone hasn’t changed.
If you’re looking for an IFS therapist in Los Angeles, there’s a good chance you’re not just looking for more insight. You may already understand, logically, why you react the way you do. You may know where some of your anxiety, people-pleasing, shutdown, perfectionism, or relationship patterns come from. And still, in the moment, it feels like something takes over.
IFS Therapists Los Angeles
Why people look for IFS therapy
A lot of the people who find us are asking some version of the same question:
Why am I still doing this when I know better?
Maybe part of you wants to set a boundary, and another part panics at the thought of disappointing someone. Maybe you know your partner is not your parent, but conflict still makes you shut down, lash out, or go numb. Maybe you love your child deeply and still find yourself flooded with fear, guilt, pressure, or anger that feels way bigger than the moment in front of you.
This is often where IFS therapy can be helpful.
We tend to use this work with clients who are dealing with trauma, anxiety, depression, a harsh inner critic, people-pleasing, perfectionism, burnout, or relationship patterns that no longer make sense to them. It can be especially helpful for people who feel like they’ve done a lot of thinking, analyzing, and trying to manage symptoms on the surface, but something deeper still feels stuck.
At our practice, that often includes trauma and perinatal mental health work. We support clients through pregnancy, postpartum, birth trauma, infertility, pregnancy or infant loss, and the emotional intensity that can come with becoming a parent. Sometimes that season brings up old fears, old pressure, old grief, or old pain in a way that feels confusing. Therapy can help us understand what’s getting activated and respond to it differently.
What IFS therapy actually feels like
IFS can sound a little weird at first, especially if you’ve never heard therapy described in terms of “parts.” We get that. For some people, it initially sounds too abstract, too unfamiliar, or just awkward.
In practice, it usually feels much more natural than people expect.
Most people already know what it’s like to have different parts of themselves pulling in different directions. One part of you wants rest, and another part won’t let you slow down. One part wants closeness, and another part wants to disappear the second things feel vulnerable. One part knows your child is okay, and another part is already bracing for disaster.
IFS gives us a way to slow that down and understand it.
Instead of treating those reactions like they’re irrational, dramatic, or something to get rid of, we get curious about them. We look at what those reactions may have been trying to do for you, what they’re afraid would happen if they stopped, and what they might be carrying from earlier experiences that never got enough care, support, or safety.
For many clients, the surprising part is not just that this makes sense. It’s that it starts to change how they relate to themselves outside of therapy too. They become less harsh, less confused, and less at war with themselves. Their inner world starts to feel less jumbled. Decisions get clearer. Their body relaxes. There is often more room to respond from the person they are now, instead of from an overwhelmed younger part that still thinks it has to run the whole show.
How we think about parts work
One of the reasons we use IFS therapy is that it gives us a non-shaming way to understand symptoms, reactions, and coping patterns.
The way we see it, the parts of you that overthink, shut down, people-please, stay hypervigilant, get angry fast, or push you to do everything perfectly are not random. They usually learned those jobs for a reason. Often, they were trying to protect you, help you survive, or get you through something hard with the tools you had at the time.
That doesn’t mean those patterns are still serving you now. It means we can work with them differently when we understand them.
We’re not trying to get rid of parts of you. We’re helping you build a different relationship with them so they don’t have to keep taking over in the same old ways. A lot of clients have spent years trying to fight themselves, override themselves, or shame themselves into changing. IFS offers a different way in.
Who this approach tends to help most
IFS therapy can be a strong fit for people who feel like they’ve already done a lot of talking, thinking, and trying, but still don’t feel free.
This may be a good fit if:
you understand your patterns intellectually, but you still feel stuck in them
your reactions in parenting, relationships, or everyday stress feel bigger than the present moment can explain
you struggle with people-pleasing, perfectionism, anxiety, burnout, or a harsh inner critic
you want to feel more self-compassion, more clarity, and more ease in your internal world, not just symptom management
We also often find this work helpful for parents in the perinatal and postpartum season. New parenthood can bring up an incredible amount of love, fear, pressure, grief, self-doubt, and old pain all at once. Sometimes what looks like “I should be handling this better” is actually a nervous system and a set of younger protective parts carrying far more than anyone has ever helped them hold.
When IFS may not be the right fit
We don’t think IFS therapy is the right approach for everyone, and we want to be honest about that.
This may not be the best fit if:
you want a highly directive therapist who tells you exactly what to do at each step
you’re looking for immediate coping tools only and are not interested in exploring the underlying pattern
the parts-based language continues to feel too forced or distancing, even after it’s been adapted to fit you
That doesn’t mean therapy isn’t a fit. It may just mean a different approach would be more helpful right now. At Her Space Los Angeles, we integrate IFS therapy with EMDR, somatic therapy, and other trauma-informed approaches depending on what’s actually needed.
IFS has a growing research base and is widely used by trauma therapists as a way to work with inner conflict, trauma responses, and protective coping patterns in a non-pathologizing way.
How we use IFS at Her Space Los Angeles
At Her Space Los Angeles, we use an IFS-informed approach in therapy as part of our broader trauma and perinatal mental health work. That means we draw on parts work to help clients understand inner conflict, reduce shame, and respond to themselves with more compassion, while also integrating EMDR and somatic approaches when that makes sense.
Our practice has training and continuing education in IFS, ego-state and parts-work approaches, trauma-focused therapy, and ongoing consultation that supports this work. We do not use IFS as a rigid script or one-size-fits-all technique. We use it thoughtfully, collaboratively, and in a way that fits the client in front of us.
Sometimes parts language clicks right away. Sometimes we adapt the language and pull from other approaches that feel more natural or more effective for what a client needs. The goal is not to force a model onto your experience. The goal is to help you feel more understood, more grounded, and more able to move through your life from the adult you are now instead of from the old survival strategies that still keep getting activated.
Frequently Asked Questions
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EMDR may be a good fit if you keep getting triggered in ways that feel bigger than the present moment, or if you understand your patterns intellectually but still feel stuck in them. Many people we work with are high-functioning on the outside but privately dealing with anxiety, shame, overwhelm, perfectionism, or trauma responses that don’t seem to match their life now. You do not need to have one “big” trauma or a perfect explanation for why something still affects you. Part of our job is helping you figure out whether EMDR makes sense for where you are right now, rather than pushing you into a modality before it feels like the right fit.
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We use EMDR therapy to help clients process experiences that still feel stuck in the present, including relational trauma, reproductive and perinatal trauma, acute trauma, and overwhelming life events. EMDR can be helpful when trauma shows up as anxiety, panic, shame, people-pleasing, perfectionism, emotional reactivity, shutdown, or a body that feels like it is still bracing for something. In our practice, we often use EMDR with clients working through birth trauma, pregnancy loss, childhood emotional neglect, narcissistic abuse, sexual trauma, medical trauma, and other experiences that continue to shape how they feel, relate, or cope. The goal is not just insight, but helping the past feel less charged so you can move through the present with more steadiness and choice.
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No — you do not have to tell the full story of a painful experience in detail for EMDR to be effective. EMDR is a structured therapy process, but we use it in a collaborative and flexible way that starts with getting to know your history, understanding what feels activated now, and building enough safety and grounding before moving into deeper trauma work. During reprocessing, we different forms of bilateral stimulation while helping you notice what comes up emotionally, physically, and internally. We move at a pace that fits you, rather than forcing a one-size-fits-all process.
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Yes — you do not need a perfectly clear memory or a neatly organized trauma story in order for therapy to be helpful. Sometimes trauma shows up more as anxiety, body sensations, emotional overwhelm, self-blame, or patterns in relationships than as one specific memory you can easily describe. In EMDR, we can work with what is showing up now and stay curious about the experiences, beliefs, or protective patterns underneath it. If your trauma feels fuzzy, fragmented, or hard to put into words, that does not mean it “doesn’t count.”
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It depends on what you’re wanting help with, how long the pattern has been there, and whether we’re working with one specific event or more layered trauma over time. Some clients notice meaningful shifts relatively early, while others need more time to build safety, work with protective patterns, and process the deeper roots of what’s happening. EMDR is not something we rush into before your system feels ready enough for the work. In our practice, the goal is not speed for its own sake, but doing trauma work in a way that feels thoughtful, effective, and sustainable.
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EMDR can feel intense at times because it can bring up emotion, body sensations, grief, or memories that have been carrying a lot of charge for a long time. That said, trauma work should not feel like being thrown into the deep end alone. We pay close attention to pacing, grounding, and how much activation your system can handle, and we often integrate relational, attachment-focused, parts-based, and somatic support to help the process feel more manageable. Our job is to help create enough safety and steadiness for meaningful trauma work without pushing you past your limits.
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Yes. We offer in-person EMDR therapy at our Pasadena office for clients in the Los Angeles area, and we also provide online therapy for residents of California when telehealth is the better fit. During a consultation, we can talk through whether in-person or online EMDR makes the most sense based on what you’re wanting support with and how you feel most comfortable doing the work. Our practice focuses on individual therapy for adults rather than couples or family therapy.
Considering IFS Therapy in Los Angeles?Schedule a consultation to talk through whether IFS therapy, EMDR, somatic therapy, or another approach fits what you’re dealing with.